Eulogies for Becky were given at the funeral luncheon at Arrowhead Golf Club. Eulogies were given by Jay Cosentino, Jessie Cosentino, Carolyn Bonistalli, Paul Cosentino, Linda Borman, and Sandy Drummond.
Following is the eulogy given by Jay Cosentino:
It wasn’t supposed to be this way. We were supposed to grow old together and 62 is not old. Becky wanted to travel and enjoy our senior years. But, I guess God had other plans that we have yet to understand.
Becky wanted to travel to exotic places like Chesterfield Michigan, San Francisco California, and the Chicago lakefront.
The miracles of medical science are a two edge sword. The inhumanities that Becky was put through have bordered on the cruel. Her affliction was Inclusion Body Myositis. It is a rare disease that attacks one’s muscles. There are different flavors of myositis and Becky had the worst kind with no known effective treatment. At first, she had some difficulty climbing stairs. Over a number of years, it progressed where she had to use a cane to walk. Then, a walker. Recently, she needed a wheelchair for all mobility.
In March, she suffered from aspiration pneumonia which is common among IBM patients. In September, the same thing, but it was harder for her to overcome. But, overcome she did, proving some doctors wrong. She was examined by doctors last Wednesday and given the clearance to go home from the rehabilitation center. She so much wanted to go home. She was in good spirits and everything was looking up! We were so happy!
I saw her at 6pm on Wednesday and she was great! Then, I got the call at 4:00am that they sent Becky back to Edward Hospital. Another bout of aspiration pneumonia. ..… But it can’t be! This was the day she was supposed to go home! She never made it home.
Becky was my best friend and the rock of our family. She was everything and I will be nothing without her. Luckily, I was able to spend a lot of time with Becky this past year as her condition worsened. I would hop into the hospital bed with her and cuddle for hours at a time. I saw her every morning and every late afternoon; my work simply took a back seat to this important task.
I met Becky at Pansophic Systems. We each have a different story on how we met. She remembers an International Lunch Group. I remember the Red Robin bar in our office building. I think we are both right. She was a wild and crazy girl! Loved to have fun and dance. Loved people. ……. Jessie, this is why you are the way you are.
Becky was not a soccer mom. No. She was a baseball mom. More specifically, she was a green wave mom. Andy played for this baseball team from the age of 9 to college. Becky would be at most games waving her “green wave fan” and singing “we’re all crazy in Chicago”. For years, we spent all of our vacation time on baseball trips and Becky would have it no other way.
On one trip when the boys were only 10, we went to Missouri for the CABA World Series, representing the state of Illinois. We stayed in a god awful motel; the kind where every room entered from the outside. There was a sidewalk and then the curb where we parked. It was terrible. At night we would sit on the curb and drink. Even with the bugs and rodents in the rooms, we look back on this with very fond memories.
Matt was also a baseball player and football player. Becky hardly ever missed a game. But, Matt’s true calling was as a technical guru. Whether he was giving technical advice on message boards or starting his web design efforts. When Becky wanted any computer help, she spurned my efforts to assist her in favor of Matt. She thought everything of Matt.
In recent years, we would go see Matt when the Air and Water show was in Chicago. Matt’s apartment is directly across from Lincoln Park, facing east from the 15th floor. The jets would come right over our heads and shoot across the lake. Becky loved the trip because she could see the show with Matt.
Becky was also a Dance Mom. Jessie started dancing when she was 2 and is doing it professionally now. Becky loved anything to do with dance because she loved Jessie so much. From the early recitals to the professional performances of Cardinalidae, she is so proud of what a great person Jessie has become.
On one trip to New York to see Jessie perform, it took everything she had plus what we had for her to climb the few stairs to see the performance. This she gladly did in order to see Jessie.
Becky was a White Sox fan. She loved the Sox (and by definition, this means she hated the Cubs). She would keep me up to date with baseball news as she received emails from Kenny Williams. A year and a half ago, she fell and broke her ankle. But, she would not see a doctor that day because she did not want to miss the Sox game that night. The next day, she was in a walking cast.
Becky could not have been a pack rat because she was always getting me to throw my stuff out. But, she kept her own things like forever. Her stash of unused greeting cards always came in handy. But just the other day, we found out what a pack rat really keeps. She has every baby tooth from our three kids in a small jar. I never knew this.
Becky was a computer wiz. She had an iPhone, an iPad, a laptop PC and a desktop PC. At one point, she took a picture of Andy and Amy in front of their newly constructed house. Becky used Photoshop to delete a worker in the background. And, she smoothed out Amy’s pants to show off her slender look. No one ever noticed her technical mischief.
Becky was a great cook. After the kids left and she had more time, she would create these amazing dinners for me. Her inspiration was a Julia Child movie, Julie and Julia, and she got her Art of French Cooking book. But, for me, the best was Becky’s spaghetti sauce using my Mom’s recipe, and cannoli, an Italian desert, using my grandmother’s recipe. Yes, she was the family’s honorary Italian.
A great joy to Becky was her friends. They say one can be judged by the friends one keeps. Well, her friends were lifelong friends that did so much for Becky when she needed it most. A special mention to Donna, Terri, Nancy, Anna, and Linda. Also, Pam, Karen, Mary Leah, and many others. To all of her friends, a very special thank you from me for all you have done for Becky.
Becky was nothing short of a very special Mother. She loved and was so proud of her three children. They were her joys in life. Her eyes would light up every time she saw them. And, the love was reciprocated. She would do anything for them, and I think she still will.
I think her greatest joy in recent years was being a grandma. So far, she has two grandchildren from Andy and Amy. Aileen is 7 and Becky would just stare at her pictures for hours. And, Aiden is 3 so Becky loved to see her little Spiderman.
(paragraph mistakenly excluded in the original eulogy) Becky will be resting forever at Assumption Cemetery. This is located only a stone’s throw from Cantigni Park in Wheaton. For the past several years, we would go to hear their weekly, summer concerts. They have a small band shell and several hundred people might be there. From Assumption Cemetery, if she listens hard, she will be able to hear and enjoy the concerts like she had in the past.
Becky, looking at you now, I am so sorry because you deserve a much different outcome. I have always loved you and did my best to make you happy. I know that we had our good times and not so good times, like most married people. I cherish those good times. And, interestingly enough, I have forgotten the bad times. Becky, I hope that you also relish in those good times as well.
Becky, I miss you so. No, it is more than that. I don’t know yet how I can survive without you. From your lofty vantage point in heaven where you are now, I still need you. You are now with your father, your grandparents, my Mom and Dad, Mary Cosentino, Jeffery Bonistalli, and some friends who have gone before you. I know that they are welcoming you. I take joy in knowing that you are with these people who also love you. Someday, when God thinks the time is right, I will join you. Please keep a seat open next to you for that day.
